Present or Perfect

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Being present and what that truly means.

A few months ago I read the book Present Over Perfect by author Shauna Niequist. It is AMAZING!! Okay, well I didn’t actually “read” it, I’m more of a books on tape gal AKA Audible...Totally besides the point.

In her book she talks about her life, and I can't help to let it resonate with my own.

"...it’s like I was pulling a little red wagon, and as I pulled it along, I filled it so full that I could hardly keep pulling. That red wagon was my life, and the weight of pulling it was destroying me. I was aware that I was missing the very things I so badly longed for: connection, meaning, peace. But there was something that kept driving me forward — a set of beliefs and instincts that kept me pushing, pushing, pushing even as I was longing to rest."

I felt that same push. That constant desire to add one more little thing to the "to-do" list. An immediate need to say yes to everything. To everyone. So much that at one point, when I was asked a simple question, I would nearly cringe. I felt the tension rise. Because I knew myself. I knew whatever the question, the comment, the story... I would find a way to insert myself into it.

'Helping' I convinced myself. I want to be a help, a resource, a problem solver for others. I loved it. I still do. I want to be the planner of the party. The hostess. The DIY queen. The one that has 300 perfect pictures of her kids doing macaroni crafts while in that Joanna Gaines looking kitchen whipping up a full 6 course meal, with nothing but leftovers. But I was missing it. I was missing life. I was missing the whole point! ... I was not present.

I started to ask myself, was I really paying any attention to that moment? What can I remember from it? What was my mind leaning into when I should have been focused, listening and really being in the moment with the boys.

Take a moment, a day even. Pay attention to how often your truly there. No phone, no distractions, no multitasking, not having a half conversation with your husband while your youngest is trying soooo hard to tell you the most amazing story on how he road on the back of an alligator in his dream.

It's rare. It's unfortunate. It's today's world and what we've let it become. I'll say it again. It's what WE'VE LET IT BECOME. Fast paced, unappreciated. We get so caught up in whats the next thing, that we never actually make the time to relish in the now thing.

Let the call go unanswered. Say the longer prayer. Walk a little slower. Snuggle a few minutes longer. Give them the blue snow cone, hell, have one with them. Let them tell you every single story they can, and hang on to every single word. God has given us an opportunity to slow down. Let us not forget to be grateful for that. Lets not let the perfect get in the way of the present.